Staying focused

God: Patrick, read My word. It is time. What better resource for you to begin your writing career than by digging into My word. I have given you a wonderful way of seeing the written word, and it will be a part of the uniqueness behind what you write.

So, Lord, should I become a writer full time, or should I take a part time job?

God: Patrick, stay focused on Me. What is the benefit of your writing? Paying bills or doing what is in your heart to do, which is to love Me, spread My kingdom, and have the joy you have been looking for?

Me: Well, right now, my concern is not putting a burden on my wife as the sole income earner. Of course, I want to do what is in my heart, but that seems such a far-off thing, and what keeps coming to my mind is what I can see, which is a monthly budget that has been cut in half.

God: Remember what I told you. Trust Me with your finances. Write, and bury yourself in My word. What qualifies you for your calling is not winning contests or getting published or making a living, but My grace on your life. Every prophet felt unqualified for My call on their life. The point is not their achievements, but their obedience to My heart and My will.

I will provide for you and I will prepare you for your calling. I have placed you in a position where you will flourish in My calling for your life. Do it. Don't worry about the money aspect. I am life everlasting, I am blessing, I am your Father.

Me: Lord, will you pay our bills? Will You help me earn a living? Will you be the source?

God: Patrick, I love you. What does that mean to you?

Me: Lord, what about the books that I had an idea to write? Should I pursue that?

God: Is it in your heart to do that?

Me: I think so. I want to write about You, though. Would people buy a book about You and {that topic}?

God: I would.

Me: Ha! OK, Lord. What does it mean to You, when You say "I love you?"

God: Patrick, it means everything. Without you, I could not live.

Me: Whoa! I can't hear that. That is really hard...what do you mean?

God: Patrick, why do you think I did all of this? My relationship with you makes Me whole. yes, it is a part only, but I cannot live without all of the pieces.

Me: So you are saying that you predestined our relationship? And...

God: No, Patrick, that is not the point. I was killed so that our relationship could be whole and unrestricted. My earthly death was necessary to include you. I know your whole life, and I know the whole story. I will have victory in the end, because of my love for you and everyone. My love created, and it cannot exist without My creation.

Me: Lord, I am going to have to chew on this, because I don't know theologically how to handle it.

God: OK, chew. Let me know if you get anywhere with that. But do not forget to ponder what it means to you that I love you. there is a wealth of treasure to be found there.